Rage against the meringue!

I'm loving this.

Protesting in the street is funky enough to overcome my general wedding loathing. Regardless of how unconventional the person, once they meet that special someone, they end up jammed into a fancy frock in a stately home/club someplace. I blame the parents.

But perhaps the anti-wedding planners don't go far enough. Why invite anyone at all? Given how much I hate weddings, the worst thing I could conceive of is inflicting one on my friends. Are people who've known you for years going to be moved by an awkward, archaic public address about your love? Do your single friends really need their noses grinding into your coupledom over the space of several excruciating hours?

But at least they can content themselves with eating, drinking and making merry while knowing just how stressed and miserable the 'happy couple' really are. Because a wedding is (I understand) rather like a party conference. As the intrepid anti-wedding planners discovered, it involves lots of complicated arrangements made over several months and, just like a party conference, everyone involved has extremely strong views (i.e. the relatives). Oh, and it can be wallet-busting - the average wedding costs £15,925. I am told there are tears long before bedtime.

The scary thing is that no one will own up to this. Be out and proud, people! And, if in doubt, elope!

NB: Femme de R awaits outrage... Before anyone says anything, I am about as romantic as a spinach bomb. Always have been, always will be.